Dear Batman,

I drew the enclosed picture of you today. I know it’s not quite a Neil Buchanan but it’s of you smiling.

Why? I watched your new documentary today at the IMAX. The one in Waterloo. They say it’s the biggest cinema screen in the UK. I’m not so sure; I thought the Odeon in Slough was bigger. Although *laugh* I haven’t been there since I was ni…

… oh no! Sorry, really put my foot in it there! Weren’t you nine when your parents were murdered? Argh, I’m making it worse.

I’ll move on. Your documentary was most enjoyable and insightful.

Thrilling though it was to see the life of a civilian crime fighter such as yourself however, I was upset to see that you are still as sad looking in this third and final episode. I believe you can fight crime with a smile on your face. It’s OK to smile, you’re doing a good thing quashing thugs and lowlives. I assume many to be on crack or some other illegal class A drug. Possibly even petty theft or fraud.

Look at the other enclosed picture, Xena: Warrior Princess smiling.

Please, whenever you hit those gun wielding ruffians, think of my picture (and of Xena) and know there is at least one person (and Xena) who thinks this is reason to smile. Cheer up twinkle.

Kind regards,

Jack Wallington