Dear Liam Tancock,

Congratulations on being an Olympic gold medalist and for your recent deal with Speedos.

I came across the picture of you on the right in Metro newspaper the other day. Don’t take this the wrong way but I hadn’t heard of you before because I don’t really follow swimming events. The article about you did make me wonder about your name though.

I’m not expecting you to know the answer to this right away but thought you’re probably the best place to start.

Does the surname Tancock come from tanning cockerals or from simply seeing tan coloured cockerals?

I suspect the latter because it seems unethical to tan cockerals. I enclose a picture of a tan coloured cock. Seeing this, do you think it would be unethical to tan him?

Hoping for a reply in posthaste.

Kind regards,

Jack Wallington